Thursday, July 15, 2010

On Aging and Happiness...

I recently read several articles about a recent study on happiness highlighting the relative differences between younger and older adults. The study found the happiness is correlated with age, but not in the way most people might think. In fact the study found that happiness peaked somewhere near age 65.

A close friend of mine is always reminding himself (and me) that he is getting old. Since 'old' is a relative term, I interpret this as meaning that he is getting 'older'. But what does that mean? Older than what? For sure we're all older than we were last year... or yesterday... or even since a few moments ago so this interpretation of 'older' is so inherent that it is not even worth saying. So then what do we mean by we're getting 'older'?

Perhaps we have an idea of what constitutes a happy life and we believe we are getting to old to live that life? I distinctly recall when I was 27 feeling that only had 3 more good years and after that it was all down hill. I can honestly say that my first 27 years were pretty good, but the time since has been even better. We can never be sure what the future holds, but we can be sure that we have right now. So my happiness advice is:
  • Never fret about the past because there's nothing we can do about it. Learn whatever lessons the past has to teach us and move on.
  • Figure out the things that we actually have power to change or influence. Make sure that our actions in these areas are in line with our desires for our life and happiness.
  • Figure out the things that we cannot change. To be honest, we actually have very little power of much but we do control how we react to what is happening around us. Therein lies our power. For those things that we don't control, be honest and admit it. Once we admit it, we can treat it like the laws of gravity. No one ever gets pissed at gravity when the fall because they know that gravity cannot be controlled. Rather they stressing about gravity we think that we should be more careful. So next time you encounter an asshole, understand that some (few not most) people are assholes and always will be and that this cannot be changed. Our power is in how we deal with the asshole such that it contributes or at least does not detract from our life and happiness.
  • Learn to appreciate the good in things.

No comments: