Monday, March 31, 2008

Creating My Life

This post is part of my Life Thoughts series that attempts to document and share my views on life and the principles that guide me through it.

First a disclaimer: The title of this post is not original. Rather, I borrowed it from a fellow blogger, named creatingmylife, who has a blog by the same name. When I first saw the title on his blog, it immediately connected it to thoughts that I hold dear.

I believe one of the most fundamental choices that we all make in life is whether or not we will live our lives as victims. Many of us do not even realize that we've made such a decision, but in fact we make it everyday. Yes, life gives us constraints, however, we have far more power to mold our destiny that many of us (perhaps including myself) realize. Creating my life entails deep self-evaluation and asking myself, "who do I want to be?". Then I can start to make that vision a reality.

To gain such control over one's life, necessitates being an optimist in that you must believe in the possible. Unfortunately, many people confuse optimism with naivete, but allow me to demonstrate the difference. Let's say that I wanted to help an in trouble teen that has a history of drug addiction. Optimism helps me believe that it is possible for him to overcome his dependency. However, it would be naive or stupid for me to loan him my wallet full of cash after he'd been clean for a day. Many people become become pessimists because they feel that it protects them from life's disappointments and being taken advantage of. However, if you can distinguish the difference between optimism and naivete, then you can protected yourself from stupid mistakes while nourishing that inner child that looks to the future with bright anticipation.
So what kind of life do I want to create?

I want to be a person that others respects. I want be kind and caring to others regardless of race, age, beauty, religion, body type, and social class. I want to be the kind of person that acknowledges a bum on the street and treat them as my equal. I want to be a person that is true to my word. I want to be a person that is accepting of the diversity of others (note: the one thing I cannot tolerate others is disrespect of others). I want to be patient. I want to be positive about life without being naive.

I want to travel. I want to be constantly expanding myself through continued learning and the pursuit of language. I want to better my understanding of the world around me and it's peoples.

Sunday, March 30, 2008

My Life as a Christian Fundamentalist

When I was about 12 years old, my oldest brother joined an independent, fundamentalist, bible church in Manhattan. My brother is 10 years older than me, so I looked up to him a lot. Subsequently, I started attending the church with him. By my high school years, my brother and I were both fixtures at the church. He was a deacon and in charge of sound production and I was highly active in the youth group. I even went to the church's high school for my senior year. By my senior year I highly regarded as a good christian and even won the school's Most Spiritual award.

When it came time to pick a college, I really didn't know what to do. Jerry Falwell's Liberty University offered 50% scholarships to anyone from my church that wished to attend and it seemed like the answer that I was seeking. I visited the school with a group of other teenagers and frankly, loved it.

The school really inundated its students with religious meetings in addition to the typical class load. There following were all required:
- Sunday morning service,
- Sunday evening service,
- Monday night prayer group (small groups held in the dorms),
- Wednesday night service,
- Monday, Wednesday and Friday morning chapel services,
- Bible classes during your freshman and sophomore years, and
- A required christian service class usually requiring 2 or 3 hours weekly.

I quickly became a prayer leader. Eventually, I became a resident assistant (RA), which was good because it came with a $12,000 scholarship that covered tuition, room and board and up to $200 worth of textbooks. What a godsend that was. Obviously the competition for these positions is huge so they put us through a very rigorous process before selecting just a few. More is expected of RAs at Liberty U than of typical universities since the RAs are also supposed to be the dormitory's mommy and daddy, first line spiritual counsellor, and the primary enforcers of the schools many, many rules that would have shocked most students of other schools.

I definitely struggled with my sexuality while in school, even as I counselled others. Luckily, my mind compartmentalized my gayness such that I could survive in this homophobic environment without being completely traumatized. Somehow even as I would occasionally go through cycles of buying gay porn then destroying it, there was a part of me that had no idea that I was gay.

Interestingly enough what drove me from the church had nothing to do with my sexuality, but my eventual inability to accept the judeo-christian version of God. My argument is as such, if God exists, then he must be as far above us as we are above an ant. Therefore, our understanding of the nature of God, his desires, his motives, and his goals must be as incomprehensible to us as an ant trying to understanding that humans must go to work to buy braces for their kids and pay the mortgage. Hell, my dog can't even understand why I have to leave every morning. I don't say this to try to convince anyone, which I know would be futile, but to describe how I came to believe what I believe.

Anyway, I am not saying that god doesn't exist, because I have no way of knowing. I only state that I cannot buy the image of god that has been taught to me. It just seems way to convenient. It seems exactly like what god would be if humans invented him. I now consider myself agnostic.

(Not So) Nudist Get Together

Yesterday, the BF and I received an invitation to get together with another gay couple living in the southern Maryland suburbs of DC for drinks. We've never met them before, but I had traded messages with one of them through a nudist website. The idea was that we would get together, hang out nude, get know each other and take possibly a dip in their hot tub.

They were a nice couple that have been together for many years and we enjoyed their company and getting to know them, but I must bring out the irony of the situation. We were four self-proclaimed nudists in a private setting and yet never removed our clothes. I guess I could have just dropped my pants, but somehow my upbringing doesn't allow me to do such things without invitation.

Anyway, it was fun. We had wine, beer, cookies and discussed a wide-range of social topics. They were cool guys and I hope we get the opportunity to get to know them better.

People Who Need People

I think I may have said this before, but I've come to the conclusion that the most rewarding things in life tend to be our relationships with others and activities we do. I say this because our society subtly emphasizes that happiness comes from material things. I've written about this a little earlier here.

I've been fortunate over the past few months to have met a lot of new people. Some I would call friends whereas others were people I met once and will likely never see again. Nonetheless, I can't help but often feel enriched by even the briefest encounter, particularly if we shared a moment of sincerity.

In some ways I think humans are nearly as communal as ants in that most of us too crave touch and that feeling of closeness and connectedness. Unfortunately the downside of our enhanced self-consciousness makes us build up walls around us to separate and protect us.

In many social situations, people stand around and for the most part, talk to people that they already know. I am convinced that often, even the most unapproachable looking people, would gladly like to connect with others, but resort to the familiar because of the walls we've built. Of course this doesn't apply to everyone, but I believe it is more true than not. There have been a few places where I have noticed the walls that separate us come down. One has been at nude social events which is partly why I enjoy these so much. The other has been on the all-gay cruises that I've been on with the BF.

Lest you think that I think I am above such things, let me say that I too am not immune from building protective walls. For example, I am a touchy person. No I won't cry if you say something mean, but rather I am referring to liking to be touched and to touch others. However, I typically don't touch people I don't know well at all. I mean, not even the smallest, socially-acceptable touches. This is a wall I've built. Most people would probably enjoy the touch except that they too would become self-conscious and therefore feel awkward. Of course the irony is that in the end we both miss out on something that would be enjoyable because of both our respective hangups.

Anyway, the point is that I love people. I love their differences and their stories. I find that each person is unique and interesting and I take a little something away from everyone I meet. I find that everyone has something that bring to enrich the world if only we take time to dig past stereotypes and preconceived ideas to understand them. The only people that I tend not to like are those that I see mistreat or take advantage of others, even when they've treated me well. And I believe strongly that it is these interactions and relationships that enrich us and contribute to our happiness. I think we'd all be a little more happy if we'd just let ourselves be a little more.... human.

World Naked Bike Ride Pictures

Thought I'd post an update to my pursuit of the participating in the World Naked Bike Ride. I still hope to attend and ride completely nude, however, I'm still not sure the DC ride in June will allow for nudity. I'm hoping that the meeting that the DC group has with the DC metro police and the park police will produce a definitive answer or at least an inkling of one. I'm hoping that I'll get a heads up before the date so that I can perhaps participate in another city such as Chicago, Miami or perhaps in Canada as a second choice. I'm a little conflicted though because I'd feel like I would be bailing on the DC group if I went to another city.

Here is a link to pictures from WNBR from around the world.

Friday, March 28, 2008

Nude Yoga

OK, I often get remarks that I try to do too much. Both my mom and mother-in-law worry sometimes that I am too physically active. No, I am not talking about sex. My current physical activities: I play tennis 3 or 4 times a week for about 2.5 hours at a time, I workout 3 days a week and I try (often unsuccessfully) to get a little cardio in between.

Well, a few weeks ago I heard about nude yoga. Of course I had to try, so I sent an email to DC's Men's Naked Yoga to register for the class and bought a yoga mat. Yoga always looked hard to me, so my biggest fear was not the nudity part of it, but rather the yoga. I think I know my body and there are somethings that come very easy for me, however, there are other positions that others find natural to which my body rebels.

So the Wednesday came for my first session. I couldn't convince the BF to come, so I had to go it alone. I took a taxi to yoga studio and arrived a good 30 minutes early so that I could stake my claim to space in the back of the class. There was cute middle-eastern looking boy out front of the studio who asked me if I too was there for nude yoga. He didn't seem shy at all. He didn't know about the door code required to get in. I buzzed the intercom and we both went upstairs together.

There were probably about 20 to 30 guys there, all naked of course. The atmosphere was very tranquil and relaxing. I guess that's how yoga studios are supposed to be. Gentle music filled the room. I dropped trough, laid out my mat and placed my things into one of the little cubby holes. The people there were very friendly. I met quite a few people there, too many to remember their names. I love that instead of shaking hands, everyone greeted each other with a hug. I can't help but think that the world would be a better place if we all hugged more.

So, how was the yoga? It was simultaneously strenuous and relaxing. We went through a series of positions and flows as led by the instructor (BTW: he was hot and had a gorgeous body). Some positions seem to emphasize stretching whereas others focused on strength. Yoga tends to work out and stretch a wider variety of muscles than I believe a typical gym workout would. Other exercises seem to focus on increasing blood flow.

The next day I was so sore. I wasn't sure if this was from the 4 hour tennis session, my leg workout or the yoga. Probably, it was all of them combined. That was OK though, since I like the feeling of moderate soreness. I reminds me that I have muscles and that I used them.

In the past, I would often get a tightness in the bottom of my back after standing for 20 minutes or more or walking for an hour or more. The only way to relieve this tightness is to sit down, bend over, or find some other way to stretch my lower back. I don't fully understand this since I can play rigorous tennis for 4 hours or more, but there it is. One yoga stand we did was the shoulder stand (see picture). This stance stretched my lower back more than anything I've ever done. Coming out of the stance, the instructor led us through several minutes to allow the back to gently recover from the stretching. I have to say that for the first time in the past couple of years, I have not felt my usual back tightening since.

Anyway, I think I'll continue with naked yoga, because, of course, everything is more fun when done naked. I've since been back again and have gotten the BF to promise to accompany me next week.

Maybe I'm an Exhibitionist

This post is part of my Why I Like to Be Nude series. In my brief couple of months discovering my penchant for nudity, I've read countless of accounts by others of the benefits of social nudity. The Why I Like to Be Nude series is my attempt to discover and document my own reasons.

I think I may be an exhibitionist. You may be thinking... duh, but for me this is truly a revelation. Like I've said previously, I've spent much of my life as a very reserved person. Most people that have met me recently scoff when I say that, but it is wholeheartedly true, and I'm not trying to be modest.

I now find myself somewhat of an attention whore. Yes, I like to be noticed. Is that bad? I'm not sure. Of course I'd rather the attention to be positive, but I am not so moved by the comments of others that I fear what others are thinking or saying too much. These two combined facts have brought me a sense of freedom that allows me to be who I am, or even better yet, who I want to be.

Now, one might wonder if the rush of exhibitionism would lead to indiscreet public nudity. First, I'm not sure that displaying the human body in its natural form should even be labeled as indiscreet. Secondly, although I would love the idea of being nude in public places, even when others may be fully clothed, I have no desire to be arrested so I have no desire to streak.

Being naked only heightens the rush of exhibitionism. At the same time, it attracts attention, and allows me to be who I am (physically at least).

Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Support the DC World Naked Bike Ride

I don't want to advertise anything on this blog, but I wanted to encourage the 2 people that read this (I know you're out there!) to support the DC World Naked Bike Ride. Each shirt purchased nets $5 to be used on publicity for the event. Shirts may be purchased here. Once at the site, click on Services, then on the displayed shirt.

My Nude Week

Chronicling my nude activities last week... Let see, I was supposed to go nude yoga on Wednesday, but decided to take a friend up on an invitation instead. I added yoga to my exercise routine to my already active schedule of tennis 3-4 times a week and working out in the gym 3 times a week.

Anyway, the friend who invited me and the BF over for nude drinks had invited several others well. All told, there were 5 of us. I was drinking Margaritas. The people were interesting and conversation unforced before the ambiance turned more sensual. Let's just say it was fun.

On Saturday we went to the Green Lantern for their underwear night. I wore black mesh underwear, but given the lighting at the GL, nothing was too noticeable. I had a good time. Talked to a lot of people that I knew and met a few others. I had the forward proposition I've ever heard that night. I said "hi", he said "I'm looking for a top." Talk about dispensing with pleasantries! Anyway, as always, I went home with my BF.

This week the BF and I went to a naked movie night get-together. We all watched Chuck and Larry which was alright. At least I hadn't seen it before. In general, the group was a bit older, but it still was cool to just hang out nude together. My BF said he wouldn't return again, but I probably would if the opportunity arises.

Around the house, I didn't go nude too much since my mother-in-law is with us, however, I did go nude as much as possible.

My BF Birthday

Today was my BF's birthday. Originally, I planned to embarrass him by having flowers delivered to his office. In the end I decided not to only because our 15th anniversary is next week and I thought that would be a better cause for embarrassment. Anyway, we celebrated with cake, balloons and a quite dinner at home.

Sunday, March 23, 2008

Tennis Today

Today I had my weekly tennis match with the CTA singles tennis league. CTA is a gay tennis organization that hosts leagues, tournaments, ladders, socials and everything else connected to tennis. I am new to the group and have only played 5 matches so far, but have done fairly well so far.

Today I played OK. I was fairly consistent, but had trouble hitting through the ball. I split sets to come away with a tie. I won the first set 6-4 and lost the second 4-2 since we ran out of time.

Friday, March 21, 2008

My Favorite Jeans (Update #2)

creating-my-life asked to see what the jeans looked like from the back so I've uploaded a picture here. Fairly basic with the only distinguishing features being the wavy line patterns on the pockets (same as front) and the wrinkled look around the knees.

Thursday, March 20, 2008

Liberation From Fear and Shame

This post is part of my Why I Like to Be Nude series. In my brief couple of months discovering my penchant for nudity, I've read countless of accounts by others of the benefits of social nudity. The Why I Like to Be Nude series is my attempt to discover and document my own reasons.

I think that I am like most people in that I have had a lot of body shame for most of my life. Although I've generally always been a pretty self-confident person with respect to who I am as well as my abilities, I have been very timid and fearful when it comes my body. This has led to strict rules defining what could and could not be shown in public. Shorts were ok as long as they were long enough. Muscle shirts were good, but definitely not tank tops and don't even think about taking off your shirt! Just think of the havoc this wreaks when at the beach and I had to balance my dos and donts against the separate standards of modesty reserved solely for beaches.

Becoming a nudist has not made my body any more or less attractive, but it has allowed me to say that I am ok with how I am. It has allowed me to confront my worst fears face-to-face and come out the victor. This formally very conservative person is even strongly considering participating in the World Naked Bike Ride in which I'd be riding my bike stark naked down crowded city streets.

Growing up in American culture, most of us are taught from a young age that the human body is something to be shameful about. I don't believe the fashion and pop magazines depicting perfect pecs and emaciated bodies help either. However, socializing in a friendly atmosphere has had a reversing effect. Instead of nudity being associated with fear and shame, it has become associated with fun, friends and good times. I believe this is how social nudity fulfills the claim of helping people to become more comfortable and accepting of their body as well as the bodies of others.

What Type Of Guy Do You Like?

People often ask what type of guy do I like. This question always causes me problems. Not because it is not a perfectly reasonable question to ask, but because I have no idea of how to answer it.

The problem is, that I like such a wide variety of men that it is very difficult for me to categorize what I like. Even giving a simplified response makes me feel that I am excluding a great many of guys that I would find attractive. So if you ever ask me that question and my forehead furrows, now you'll know why.

So what physical characteristics do I find attractive in a man? I like slender men and I like muscled men. Sometimes a little extra meat on the bones can add just the right amount of vulnerability to make me go wild. I like dark hair men such as in Latinos and Mediterranean men, but I also love blonds and red heads (sometimes colored hair such as blue, red, etc can be hot too). I love black men and white. I love Latinos and Asians. I love Indians and middle-eastern men. Sometimes I find a man's raw masculinity such a turn-on, but at other times I love the sweet vulnerability of someone more effeminate.

I think the male body is the greatest piece of art in the world. I love its soft curves and hard lines. I love faces and hair and muscles and skin. I love it's smoothness and it's hairiness.

Now tell me, how could I possibly give a short answer that would exclude so many men bearing any of these incredibly wonderful attributes?

Friendliness and Acceptance

This post is part of my Why I Like to Be Nude series. In my brief couple of months discovering my penchant for nudity, I've read countless of accounts by others of the benefits of social nudity. The Why I Like to Be Nude series is my attempt to discover and document my own reasons.

As you may have read in a previous post, I have frequently attended a weekly underwear party hosted by the Green Lantern in Washington, DC. I have noticed that those in their underwear were much more accepting of others and more apt to talk to people that they didn't know. Interestingly, even clothed people that ordinarily wouldn't say boo to you, would strike up a discussion if you were in your undies. I can't completely explain it, but the removal of textile barriers somehow seems to correspond to the removal of social barriers.

When I began socializing nude, I noticed that this maxim held true to even a larger extent. Every time I go to a nude event, I am amazed at how social it is. I always seem to meet a lot of very nice people that I previously had not known. Some of these are people that I know that I would likely never meet had we have had our clothes on. I believe that I have met more people in nude events in the past month than I typically would have at non-nude events over a period of 6 months.

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

My Favorite Jeans (Update)

Woohoo! I just received my order from yancor that I mentioned in my previous post. It was a major success. I received two pairs of jeans, a belt and two shirts and I love every single item. The jeans, belt and shirt pictured were all part of the order. Since the test was successful, I have to go now to order more!

UPDATE: Of course being as excited as I was, I just had to wear the pictured outfit out the same night I received them. I had been invited to a friends for nude drinks with a small group of 6 guys. When I dressed to leave, several of them gave me compliments on my outfit and how it made me look.

World Naked Bike Ride (Update)

Per my previous post, you may know that I am considering participating in the World Naked Bike Ride (local dc website).

DC, being the strange place that it is, has 3 different jurisdictions that have to be coordinated with to put on an event like this: dc government, national park police and dc police. Last year, the ride was approved and the park police said it would be ok to ride naked, but no answer was given by the dc police. The DC police escorted the ride and didn't do anything to the 1 rider that was completely naked (others wore a thong or a penis pouch). I've heard that the 1 completely naked guy did cover up when the stopped in front of the White House for pictures.

I'm thinking that if I do this, I'd really want to do it completely nude, even though I've had a look at the route and it is a little scary. I'm really hoping that they get a sufficient go ahead. Otherwise, maybe I'll try to go to Chicago for their WNBR.

Tuesday, March 18, 2008

Me Encanta a Barcelona

I had the opportunity late last year to take a little time off. There was gap of time between the end of one contract I was working on and the beginning of the next. Rather than seek additional work to during this period, I was decided to use the time off to do something that I would normally never do.

After much deliberation and hand wringing, I decided to go to Barcelona, Spain and enroll in the Don Quiote intensive, language-immersion school. It was perfect. They placed me into the house of a wonderful local lady named Paquita and I attended classes for 4 to 6 hours each day.

I learned that my life-long, accumulated Spanish was not only sufficient for me to get by on, but good enough for me to go out on the town, meet people and make friends and thoroughly enjoy myself. I was a little surprised that many of the Spanish words that I know are different in Castillian Spanish, but these were easily learned.

Barcelona is very different to what I am used to in the northeastern US. It is much more laid back and relaxed. The people of Barcelona place a much higher value on social activities and tend not to define themselves by their occupations as we do here. Going out for a late night on a weekend is not only more acceptable than in the states, but expected and celebrated. Also, the gay nightlife there is excellent. There are many gay bars and incredible dance clubs. Many of these establishments even have back rooms where you will find the most beautiful guys.

After spending six weeks there, I decided that I have at last found a city in which I could live. I've often thought about this. New York (where I am originally from) is too dirty and life is too complicated. The west coast is too dry and so decentralized. San Fransisco is beautiful, but still not quite for me, and Miami somehow seems just a little too decentralized. So here I remain in DC which is too cold, but where else would I go.

Well Barcelona, ay me encanta a barcelona! You may ask what is it that I love so much about this city. I love it because it has beaches including a nude beach right in the city. Unfortunately, I didn't have the opportunity to go because being November it was just little bit too cold. The weather there is not perfect, but it sure is a lot more temperate than DC. I love the emphasis Barcelonians place on social activities and having fun. I love the night life. The city itself is also beautiful and local Catalan people are somehow both cold and welcoming at the same time. I love the architecture including the neighborhoods of L'Eixample, Barri Gotic, Cuitat Vella, Barceloneta and even el Raval. I loved the parks of Montjuic and Parc Guell. I loved las Ramblas. Of course I referring to the street where all the tourists go, but even more so I love the other Ramblas that I encountered throughout the city which were beautiful. I loved the efficient metro system. I loved playing tennis (I played 8 times while there) even if there aren't any free courts like the in US. I loved partying with straight friends I met at the Port Olympic or near la Placa Royal. I loved going gay establishments like the Metro, Dietrich, la Base, Casanova, Boyberry and many, many other.

I loved living there like a local. Ahem... well as much as any Black-American can live as a local there. It's funny because I did stick out a bit, but that didn't bother me one bit. It surprised me how often people asked a black boy that obviously didn't belong there for directions. I loved waking up every morning at 8AM and going to work, which for me was going to school. I loved living in a non-tourist neighborhood in the house of a local person who didn't even speak any English.

I have to share one experience of many that I had while there. One night I went to a gay bar where I met several people. I don't tend to get really drunk normally, but this night I did. Anyway, I woke up the next morning in bedroom. Well, it kind of looked like my bedroom, but everything was just a little amiss. I tried to clear my head of the cobwebs of the night before, but the room just wouldn't make sense. I walked down the hall to the bathroom, er... wasn't the bathroom supposed to be on the left-side of the hallway? Anyway, I was still sure that everything would make sense in a moment. When I got back to my room, I had realized that this was definitely not my room. In a panic, I dressed so fast and ran out the door. Once outside, I had no idea where I was. The next day, I got both phone calls and email messages from my caretaker of the night before. I was too embarrassed to contact him and besides had no idea who he was or what he looked like. My BF and I have laughed about this quite a bit. I'd love to tell you what happened but I honestly have no recollection. I'm sure it would be a good story though.
But most of all, I realized what I want to do in life. My dream is to travel and learn. To really get to know the people that live there. To learn languages and experience exciting things. Do shed material possessions and live. Now I am looking for a wealthy benefactor to finance my worthy cause. If you'd like to donate, send money to...

World Naked Bike Ride

The 2 of you that actually read this blog (gimme a break, I'm being optimistic!) may recall that one my desires is to participate in a naked race or biking event. Well, last night I searched the Internet and found the World Naked Bike Ride. I'm trying to decide between the ride in my hometown or traveling to another city, perhaps Chicago. Last year, the DC ride had only 9 participants where as Chicago had 600. Obviously there is strength in numbers.

Anyway, I've contacted the DC group and am pretty determined to try to do this.

Thoughts on Materialism and Happiness

I tend to think alot. I naturally think about everything and as a result I have a philosophy about almost everything. I don't believe in my philosophy as necessarily being the only way or even the right way, but it has helped me navigate life and live happier.

I love western civilization, but I also feel that we have lost focus a little. I've always felt a little queasy about how we tend to think of technological progress as being inherently good. It seems to me that improvements in quality of life would be a better measure of how good something is. (disclaimer: i develop software by trade, so i'm not suggesting that we stop technological progress because then i'd be broke and homeless)

Have you ever noticed how society always await the next great invention that will alleviate the need for us to do some task? As Americans, most of us leave our house in the morning to walk about 10 feet into our attached garage. We then drive to work, but first my open the garage with a push of a button. We then drive to our place or work, which often is also within a garage, but certainly not too far of a walk. Next is an elevator ride to the designated floor, etc, etc. Is there any wonder why America struggles with an epidemic of obesity? It seems to me that our societal goal is to create devices that alleviate our need to do absolutely anything at all!

I also believe that we are slave to the things that we own. We must find places to put them, clean them, maintain them, and worry about their well-being. All of this creates mental clutter and ironically cause us to waste both time and effort.

I believe that such things will never bring lasting happiness. Rather, I believe that happiness is enhanced by doing things and our social connections. The human body, mind and psychi tend to atrophy when not used. Therefore, the goal of work-saving inventions cannot be that we do less, but that we have more freedom to do that which we love. I believe this is critical to understand. The sooner that we accept that struggle are a necessary and vital part of the human experience is the sooner we can arrange our lives such that we that stop lamenting that struggle and take an active role in determining what we want to struggle for.

For this reason I have always advise people to do something... do anything. Rekindle your passion for life. Ensure that you always have some project that you are working on that either builds you as a person, accomplishes something you've always wanted to do, or that you simply enjoy.

My Favorite Jeans

First the preliminaries... I realize that a nudist talking about his favorite pair of jeans is little oxymoronic. You see, I love being nude and wish I could be nude just about all the time. However, I do enjoy dressing up sometimes too. Is that bad?

I enjoy making myself look good. I've never been into labels and often will not buy an article of clothing that I like simply because it a prominent label on it. However, I do enjoy how some clothes make me look.

Anyway, while in Barcelona last year, my BF obligated me to go shopping. I bought a pair of jeans with a label of "Peter Cook" (pictured) and he bought two by "Cipo & Baxx". All of the jeans were very unique and had a styling that I simply have been unable to find in the US. I've searched websites and stores and there is nothing even close that I've found so far.

Well recently, I had the idea to search by the maker of the jeans. I found nothing on my jeans, but I did find 1 website that sold the style of jeans that my BF bought. The site is called yancor. I was in jean heaven! Yancor had enough different styles available to keep me happy for a long time! The site is completely written in German, but there's no way that I was going to allow a little thing like that to separate me from a pair of divine jeans. I have a 34" waist and my BF a 31". We ordered one 34" and one 33" with the idea that if the 33" jeans fit both us, then we can buy just one size and each be able to wear twice as much as if we ordered separately. I'm sure if we ever divorce, this will account for at least 2 months of negotiations between our lawyers to determine whose jeans are whose.

Anyway, the first 2 pair that we ordered are really just a test so that we can determine the reliability of yancor and ensure that we are buying the right sizes. Our order has already been shipped, but takes up to 2 weeks since it has to clear US Customs.

I can't wait to try my new jeans! Er... and go nude.

Monday, March 17, 2008

Everybody Gets Luck

One of the gay naturists groups that I joined allows members to host parties. "Everybody Gets Lucky" was the name of the party that a couple from the group planned to have in honor of St. Patrick's Day. I had never attended a party like this before and had been looking forward to it since the evite when out a couple of weeks ago. Finally, the night had arrived.

The host couple's home was elegant and grand. The basement was big and well-equipped and could have passed for a decent gay bar. There was a full bar with bar tenders, video games, slot machine, pin-ball machine, pool table and air hockey table. In the back, there was a reasonably well-lit "dark room", complete with 2 slings and several glory holes. There were also ample bar stools as well as comfortable couches and stuffed chairs in which you could comfortably relax and take it all in. Of course relaxing wasn't exactly the point. Outside, there was a good-sized deck and a pool, but it was still a little to cold to enjoy these.

As we entered, my BF, a friend that we brought along and I shed our clothes in their kitchen/breakfast area. It was fun entering being totally nude. I would say that 80%-90% of the guys their were nude and the remaining folks had their clothes on. Oh... did I mention the guys? The guys were unbelievable! Oh my god there were so many gorgeous guys there!

Anyway, the evening was mind-blowingly awesome. I have many, many memories that I'm sure will be handy in the future. Everybody did indeed get lucky.

Sunday, March 16, 2008


I enjoy the vulnerability that I feel when I am nude. I have been a very conservative person until now, so the idea of parading around in the buff is not exactly something that I have been accustomed to doing. However, I now love being exposed for all that I am and like being watched. When I am nude, I enjoy knowing that everyone can see everything about me (physically at least). It's a lot harder to act cool and don the social masks that we've all learned so well when we stand before the world bare.

Some people compliment me on my body and tell me how good it is. Honestly, I think it is just OK at best, but I've learned to accept it. When I look at myself, I can identify about 15 major physical flaws that I have. Being nude is an acceptance of my body as a whole, including all of these flaws, and present myself as a complete person to the world.

I like to be around other naked people. OK... I'm lying a little... I LOVE to be around other naked people. But sometimes the idea of being completely, stark naked in a crowd of clothed people takes my feelings of vulnerability to a whole new level. Of course I am still new to the naked lifestyle, but I'd love to attend an event that puts me in such situations. I can think of a couple of possible places. A nude beach always has some clothed people, but of course this doesn't go quite as far as I'd like to since there is likely to be a majority of nude people. Another idea I have is to participate in a nude run or bike race. That would be awesome! If anyone reading this has any legal or reasonably safe suggestions please let me know.

Saturday, March 15, 2008

How I Got Into Nudism

As my first blog posting, I'll describe how I recently got into nudism/naturism. My nudist birth occurred in November 2007 while visiting Barcelona, Spain.

Prior to my trip, I frequently visited a gay bar in the Washington area that hosts a weekly underwear party. In addition to simply liking to parade around in my skivies, I found that other patrons that chose to participate tended to be more sociable and easy to talk to than is typically encountered in this city. Of course before going to Barcelona, I did my homework on all of the tourist as well as gay things to do there. To my delight I discovered that Barcelona also had a gay bar that had an underwear night. I thought this would be the perfect ice breaker to meet new people in a strange land. I decided that I had to give it a try.

When arrived at the Barcelona bar on that Saturday night, they informed me that I missed the underwear night as it had occurred the day prior. The day arrived was nude night. Of course I was a little disappointed, but decided that since no-one in the city knew me... what the hell, I might as well go in. I loved it! It made me feel nervous and sexy and vulnerable all at the same time. As a footnote, another difference between these bars in Washington and Barcelona is that the Barcelona bar had a lot of sex occurring, but that's material that I'll cover another day.

I was hooked, so I returned the next Saturday as well. After all, after going nude, who needs underwear? On that next Saturday, I met an English speaking guy who mentioned that he too used to live in Washington, DC as recently as just a couple of months prior. He asked me if I had ever attended the nude parties in DC. Since the nude parties take place at the same bar as does the underwear parties, I had heard of them, but always declined whenever invited to participate.

When I returned to DC, I googled for nude gay groups in the area and joined ReNudePride. My BF and I attended a party that they sponsored and again I loved it. The funny thing is, I've always assumed that nudism/naturism implies some deep philosophical belief about something like the environment or the natural state of the human condition. One of my big revelations at the party was that they are just people, and that I am one of them. Yes I care about the environment, but that's not why I take my clothes off. I take my clothes off because it is fun and I enjoy it.