Going ons

Well, the week has been relatively slow, but that's all good. I haven't been able to play my usual 4x to 5x per week of tennis because of a pain in my shoulder. Damn it! I figured I'd take a week off any see how it feels on Monday. At least I can still go to the gym, so I'm not complaining (too much).

The BF and I are preparing for our second naked, nude gathering at a country home in a three week period. You can read about the first here. The last one was incredible so there's no way I would miss this one. I'm driving and so far have a total of 7 people in my car (which only fits 5) including the myself and the BF. Don't ask, it just happened. Anyway, I think I convinced one of the others to drive so it's all good. I'm really looking forward to this weekend. Last time we were too busy having fun (the clean kind) and forgot to take any pictures which was a bummer, so this time I'm going to wear a string around my finger to ensure that doesn't happen again.

So as a minor dare, I dared the BF to go to the Eagle wearing just a jock strap. Surprisingly he said yes, so we picked this Friday to do it. We'll see if he and/or really have the balls to do it. I figured Friday is a good day since there aren't too many people there like there is on Saturdays.

After waiting so long, and several false starts, we've finally decided on a date for our first visit to Sandy Hook. I have a friend that's not that big on mid-Atlantic beaches and I think he inadvertently talked me out of my first trip through no fault of his own. After re-reading comments of others on the web that go there, I decided that I just had to go, so now it's a plan.

Sex

So this weekend I went to a nude sex party. Now I haven't been to a party whose primary intent was sex for many, many years, and even then, very few times. You may be wondering about some of the other events and parties that I've written about in the past, but in fact these were not sex parties. Rather they were pool parties or nude parties where a certain amount of sexual play was permitted.

Earlier that same day, while I was on my computer, someone IM'd me. I had no idea who he was and he obviously didn't know who I was. After exchanging greetings he says, "so... are you on the ??? website?" Evidently, he had seen my profile on the site (FYI: it's a nude site, not a sex site) and had added me as a contact. He must have later forgotten who I was and just started chatting. Anyway, after a photo exchange and chatting for about 40 minutes or so, we realized that we were both going to the same naked gathering in the country next week and both going to this sex party for the first time later that day.

I arrived a little later than I planned, but well ahead of the official party time. The hosts had invited everyone to come early and hangout by the pool. By coincidence, the guy I chatted with had arrived just before us, so we met right at the entrance. By the way, both he and his boyfriend are both very good looking and about 30 y/o. Anyway, all 4 of us (including my BF) got nude and hung out in the pool area and had delightful conversation as we got to know each other.

Somewhere around 9:15, the party coordinator announced the official start. After he finished the announcement I turned my head around and indeed, the vibe had changed in an instant. I confess that I was little more active/slutty and public that I typically am. My best visual memory of the night was seeing a beautiful black boy about 27 y/o getting repeatedly fucked by about 5 different guys. I didn't follow him around or anything, so the count may have been higher. My best bonding was with the guy I met online earlier that day as we laid on a bed and cuddled and kissed. We later had sex, which was equally hot.

I remember one guy telling me that he had his eye on me for over a year, so of course I replied that I guess we'll see each other again next year. He laughed and told me no way. Later, his partner gave me his sincere thanks for making his night.

I've since chatted and exchanged emails with the guy I met online earlier in the day. Evidently his boyfriend and he own a house near Rehomo (Rehoboth Beach) and said that we must come to the beach with them. He sounded sincere, but you never know. We all hit it off so well, that I think we'd all have a great time together.

A Good Friend

I have a good friend. I have known him since my days growing as a young, catholic, school girl in NYC as we both attended the same fundamentalist church and high school. Growing up in NYC, we were very close. I watched my first porno video with this friend and we attended college together... at least for a year. He lives about 80 miles or so from me along with his devoutly Mormon wife and three kids. Interestingly enough, even after he grew up as religious as I did, he is now atheist.

His wife is extremely needy. He's an extremely good husband and father, but his wife doesn't permit him to do anything outside of the house. As a consequence of his short lease combined with how far away he lives, we rarely get to see each other.

Well he calls me up the other day and tells me that his wife has taken the kids back to her home state of Idaho and that he'd like to spend the night at my place. Now it was just a little over a year ago that I told him I was gay. Of course he had already had known, but I hadn't vocalized the fact prior to that point. At the time, he expressed being hurt that I didn't trust him enough to tell him earlier.

So tonight we had dinner at Clyde's and went to see The Dark Night. Afterwards, we went to a straight Latino bar near my house in Adams Morgan and had a few more drinks as we watched the live band play salsa and merengue. Finally somewhere around 2:45a we returned to my place where we drank Apple Martinis and played Rock Band on the Wii. Believe it or not, the more we drank, the better we played, or at least that's how I remember it.

After all this we talked for a long time. He began to ask me questions about being gay. He expressed that when he found out that I was gay, he became much more sensitive and offended by anti-gay jokes. He told me how it completely altered his thoughts about gay people and all sorts of issues such as gay marriage. Now this friend can be a little naive and trusting, so I've spent a large part of my life protecting him. But this night I had the distinct feeling that the roles were now reversed and that he just wanted to protect me. Now that's a good friend.

My First Time

Someone mentioned to me about the boldness of someone just walking up to me, which reminded me of my first time. Now as a disclaimer, I should mentioned that I did mess around with many of my friends between the ages of 12 and 16 so I'm never quite sure what qualifies as my first time. This posting is about my first time as an adult.

I grew up in New York City. However, I was never gay in New York. Ok, I was gay, but struggling on the inside and very self-repressed, so I never experienced gay New York. As I said in a previous post entitled My Life as a Christian Fundamentalist, the years preceding my first time could be described as asexual, repressed and religious.

Just out of college in my newly adopted town of Washington DC, I came to grips with my homosexuality. Shortly thereafter, I returned to NYC to visit the folks, but decided to visit this Greenwich Village that I always heard so much about. Well, being as green as I was, just walking up and down the street was about all I could've taken on that first night. It was about midnight on summer night. As I was returning to the metro along Christopher St, a black guy accompanied by a friend just stopped and stared at me harder than anyone's ever looked at me before. I was intrigued and stopped, but had no idea where this was going. He slowly walked toward me and as I waited for him to say something he did the one thing that I can remember so vividly until this very day. Without saying a word, he walked up and stuck tongue down my throat. Now this asexual, sexually-repressed young man would've been outraged if I hadn't absolutely melted like butter in his arms. He invited me back to his place, by that point I was helpless to decline, where he became the first man to fuck me. Yes it felt good.

The funny thing is just before going home I had met a Taiwanese guy back in DC that would later become my not-boyfriend, but we hadn't done anything sexual by that point. When I got back to DC just one day later he fucked me too. Welcome to the neighborhood!

Postscript: This picture of me was way younger than my age in the story, but I figured I'd include it anyway.

Folsom Update

This weekend is Dore Alley and oh how I wish I was going. But you know how it is, you can't do everything. Maybe next year though.

We're still on Folsom Street Fair though. It's happening on the 28th of September and I can't wait. I remember when I invited my friend to go with us I titled the email "How big are your balls?" They must be HUGE 'cause he didn't even hesitate. It should be a fun weekend since there's a lot of special events happening in town around the actual fair itself. Now the only thing to see is whether I have big balls too such that I can parade around the entire 6 block, people packed area wearing nothing but my shoes and leather wristbands. On the bright side, I probably won't have to check a bag on the airline.

Questioning Nudity

By the title of this post, you may think that I'm asking if nudity is health and good or bad and damaging. Or you might wonder if I'm referring to what are the relative benefits of going letting it all hang out. Well you'd be wrong. Although I've discussed some of these topics previously in a series of posts named Why Nude, that is not my intent today.

Today I want ask a question that I've been discussing with the BF. As I've said many times before, I am often struck by the openness, niceness and acceptance that comes from nudists. But I wonder... is this because nudity disarms people making them nicer than they might be in other circumstances? Or is it because nudity inherently attracts nicer people who already have a deep desire to be in the presence of others in such a disarming and intimate setting? Would taking a really mean person and putting them into a voluntarily nude setting soften them up ever so slightly?

I really don't know, but I suspect it might be a little of both. I guess I ask this question because the scientist within does care. It also likely has macro-social impacts on our society as a whole. But aside from that, I'm not sure it matters to me personally much at all. I love nudism/naturism because it is so wonderfully open, accepting and intimate and am grateful that I've had the opportunity to experience it.

Moments

As I said in my previous post entitled XXX, this past weekend was great to the point of almost being spiritual. I thought that I'd share so of the tender memories that I've come away with.

There's a guy who is probably about in his mid to late twenties that I've seen at other nude events, but have never met or talked to. He is very quiet. I never knew if this was from shyness, general personality trait or simply wanting to be left alone. He does talk to some people, but like I've said, we've never talked. Well this weekend I found myself in the pool with him for an extended period of time. We started talking and after a while, we were embracing. Facing each other, he wrapped his legs around me and floated on my lap while continuing to embrace and share sweet conversation. I'd love to tell you what we discussed, but frankly I have no recollection of the details. The point is that this was another one of many affirming intimate moments that I shared with others while there.

If you think about it, there are over 6 billion people on this planet that we share. Each one of them has a story and something profound to contribute. The amazing thing is how we don't take the time, or even more commonly purposely build barriers that make the world seem smaller, less friendly and a much more lonely place. I love knowing that there are so many wonders out there waiting to be discovered. And I love how they can touch me.

Similar to the first story, I also spent quite a bit of time with another guy in the same age range. I had seen him once before at a party that I attended, but yet again we didn't meet. I won't repeat it, but we spent time talking and kissing similar to the first. Since it was getting late, we went to lay down on his bed and continued to embrace and kiss. We didn't have sex and didn't need to.

Nudity At Its Best

So this weekend was the first of two naked gatherings that I'm attending this summer. Essentially a local group coordinates these events amongst other activities throughout the year. These gatherings are held at vacation homes in the country of members of the group that are nice enough to allow 60 naked boys to take over.

This was the first one I've ever attended and frankly I would have to describe it as idyllic. I'll try to paint a picture, but I'm sure I won't do it justice. It was just so freeing to be surrounded by nature, hot weather, a cool pool and beautiful, friendly naked boys. I love how I'll sometimes start talking to someone that I didn't know beforehand and discover an interesting and beautiful person inside.

It's funny, but I remember when I was younger, perhaps in my late teens, thinking about how much we humans crave and need to be connected with each others and yet how we live our lives in relative isolation. I remember thinking that if we just didn't have so many hang ups, and if we were able to become more accepting of and openly loving toward each other, how we'd all be so much happier. I remember thinking how this would never happen because it was unfortunately contrary to our human nature. There was so much potential for happiness that is being wasted by our own insecurities and mistrust.

It's like when you go to a bar. So two random guys are sitting separately nursing their drinks when all they really want is to meet someone new and share a moment. But of course the barriers are too great. What if you get rejected? What if they think you just looking for sex? What if you are looking for sex and they're not? And because of this, we choose to continue to sit in isolation more often than not.

I'm not saying these naked evens are perfect, but they're closer to that open, warm, accepting environment that I never thought could exist outside of family and close friends. Sex aside, this is why I love nudism. I love that it makes us all better people. It provides one with a sense of belonging, or better yet... a liberation so complete that need to belong goes away and you're free to just.... be.

FTL Part 2

Well overall the trip was fantastic. Since this was my first trip I think I will be forever in love with Ft. Lauderdale. We were traveling with a good friend of ours who is basically what I call a social whore. I say this because he is not shy and so loves meeting new people. This is probably a large part of the reason that we met so many nice people while we were there, making the trip even more fun. It wasn't planned, but we ended up renting a blue mustang convertible to get to and from the Haulover.

Haulover itself was definitely a blast and well-worth the trip. We did get some intermittent thunderstorms, but we also had some patches of nice weather too. What can I say about the beach.... Everything was perfect. The water was beautiful, clear and calm. There are no jagged rocks and shells cutting up your feet in the water. The drop off is so gradual that you can walk out quite aways before the water gets too deep. There's a nice sand bar that you can swim out too even beyond that. And the men! Oh, the men! They were beautiful and plentiful and even nice to talk to.

I remember the cute latino boy that I talked with that asked his supposedly straight friend for permission to talk to me and then pleaded for my email address. Later, after rethinking through all the weirdness of that situation I concluded that the friend must have been his pimp. I remember another latino boy that was very shyly checking out my stuff. All shyness left him after he took a puff of something and then started to publicly protest his sudden love for chocolate. I remember Dwayne, the beautiful and very nice black boy visiting from New York City who had an absolutely perfect body and face. I remember the three guys we "discretely" walked by to check them out only to have them stop us. I remember how the one laying down gave us a very nice little show. Yes, I definitely love Haulover.

The wonderful thing about the guesthouse/hotel is that their public area is so inviting that everyone spends a lot of time there. Therefore, we got to meet and spend time with nearly everyone staying there. After getting a little drunk on Friday night and therefore being a little indiscreet, my friend would introduce me to everyone as the one in locked in the 69 by the pool on Friday night. To which everyone would respond, "oh I remember you."

Well it was fantastic trip and I can't wait to return.

FTL

No, not I'm not referring to the faster than light drives on Battlestar Galactica. I know, I'm such a geek.

Well, we've been in Ft. Lauderdale for just shy of a day and so far it's been great. Mostly we've drank and hung out by the pool... naked of course. We went to a bar that I think was called George's Alibi that was amusingly enough located in a strip mall. I had a few Appletinis, which I've only just recently discovered. Afterwards we "hung out" by the pool. I'm sure that you can guess what that means. Lol. My traveling partner arranged for us all to meet up with several people at the bar and go to dinner with later. And the best part is that everyone I met was named Michael so I didn't have the normal fears of forgetting someone's name. More later.

The pic to the right is me being relaxing poolside at the Worthington Guest House.

Haulover or Bust

I'm really looking forward to this weekend. A good friend of mine, my BF and I are all headed out of town early tomorrow morning for a weekend getaway to Ft. Lauderdale and of course, Haulover Beach. I'm excited to go because I've never really spent any time in either of those two places. I think I spent a day in Ft. Lauderdale on a family vacation when I was like 9 or so. You may be wondering how a gay male, living in the eastern US seaboard has managed not to go to FTL. Well, that's because I'm still a newbie. Ferverant, but definitely new.

Anyway, I look forward to being nude as much as possible. We're staying at a nude resort that the friend recommended and supposed to meeting up with some people that he met through the HangingOutNude website.

P.S. I know the pic is not of Haulover, but it's so cute I just couldn't resist.

Sag

I'm posting this because a new law passed by Flint, Michigan is an example of the worst that government has to offer. I hold a strong belief that laws are inherently broad brush instruments and as such, there will always be cases in which the law makes no sense. Innocents are invariably caught up in otherwise well-intentioned laws. Nonetheless, I still believe that the governing a large society requires that such laws exist to settle disputes and maintain the community. However, given the imperfectness (is that a word?) of laws, it is crucial that we make laws only when there is an overwhelming public interest in doing so such that the benefits outweigh the inevitable negative impacts. I hate laws that try to legislate common sense, good manners, morality, religion and anything else of the sort. It absolutely boggles my mind that we've resorted to legislating fashion!

No I dislike sagging jeans as much as the next guy (Disclaimer: If he's hot and it actually exposes something, then that's a completely different story). But what is so illegal about showing a butt, covered by.... clothing? Funny thing is that a lot of today's youth that sag their pants were shorts as underwear. I can just imagine how much tax dollars we'll all spend (if we lived in Flint anyway) arguing about what is and isn't underwear or exactly where the bottom of the butt begins so that we can decide if the underwear were completely below it.

And as an aside, the nudist in me must comment that our natural, god-given butt crack isn't a dangerous weapon but a beautiful and marvelous creation.

Now, if they were banning white shoes after labor day, that would have been completely different.

Weekend Update

Well I did enjoy this Independence Day weekend. We went to a naked pool party at someone's house this weekend, along with well over 100 other people. Although I definitely had a blast what made this party especially enjoyable for me is that a partnered couple that are friends of mine took my invitation and attended. I know going to such a thing can be both exhilarating and completely intimidating so I really wasn't sure whether they'd make it or not. Anyway, they did make it and obviously enjoyed it.

As a footnote, I met someone that actually reads this blog! See... now I have proof that at least one person does read it! Anyway it was really nice meeting him, especially when I was somewhat engaged with someone else and he came up behind me, caressed me tenderly, then rimmed me. I can't really remember how it ended, but it ended too soon.

What Wall-E Can Teach Us

So the BF and I went to see Wall-E last Friday. I actually liked the movie, but that's not why I am writing. I am writing because not so hidden within its story are thoughts that I believe need to be considered and discussed both on a global community as well as personal basis.

In a previous post entitled Thoughts on Materialism and Happiness I discussed how western culture defines "progress" as inventions that remove all physical stress from our lives. And yet, without such stressors or challenges, we atrophy. And yet with each new gadget we do less. We drive instead of walk, use elevators and even electric knives because the back-and-forth motion is just too much.
Amongst many other messages within the move, Wall-E uses a little hyperbole to show just where we humans are ultimately heading with this philosophy. So as not to spoil it for anyone who hasn't yet seen the movie, I talk any further about the movie. What I do is quote someone else I've read who said,

"Wall-E" contends that real life is hard, real life is struggle, and that we live most meaningfully not by avoiding pain and struggle, but by engaging it creatively, and sharing that struggle in community. It argues that rampant consumerism, technopoly and the exaltation of comfort is causing us to weaken our souls and bodies, and sell out our birthright of political freedom. Nobody is doing this to us; we're doing it to ourselves. It is the endgame of modernity, which began in part with the idea that Nature is the enemy to be subdued -- that man stands outside of Nature, and has nothing to learn about himself from Nature's deep logic.

Quiero Comer Tu Culo

Since tomorrow is a holiday, we decided to go out last night. We went to the GL's "shirtless men drink free" night, which occurs every Thursday. Because it is a school night, we rarely get to go. This night, as expected due to the holiday, was more packed than normal. Both floors were literally so packed you could hardly move.

Anyway, an acquaintance of mine introduced me to his tall, cute, Latino friend from Puerto Rico. When he said his name, I immediately realized that we had met briefly once before about a year ago. The Latino leaned in and whispered into my ear, "yo queiro comer tu culo," assuming that I wouldn't understand. Well... I did. Of course it didn't go any further, but his assertiveness was kinda sexy.

Police State

Ok, maybe the title is a little over-blown... or maybe not.

I just ran across this article that describes how the rules governing investigations for the FBI may be changed to make it presumably more efficient at combating terrorism. Now, I don't typically believe in conspiracy stories, and although I know America has done many heinous things, I still believe that we are one of the greatest countries on the earth. But, our greatness has come from our understanding that power corrupts and therefore, not even our beloved government should be trusted. This was the beauty behind the founding of this country and our constitution. It ensured that power was balanced and everyone was watched.

During the Bush years we have witnessed a death of a 1001, small cuts and a few large ones. These cuts take power from the people and grant them to the government and more specifically to the executive branch. This article is yet another one that I find deeply troubling.

You see, according to the fundamentals of our laws, I have a state- and god-given right to live happily and peaceably. Partly this is governed by my rights against unreasonable search and seizure. However, the FBI is considering to change the rules such that they can open investigations that potentially allows them into our lives no reason at all other than they don't like how we live our lives. But this is OK because after all... these are terrorists right? NO!!! These rule inevitably get used in unforeseen ways to meet the needs of every person in the chain of command. So without a clear definition of what is a terrorist (and an independent body to authorize the investigations), these rules will certainly be used to compile investigations on political rivals or anyone else.

I feel like I'm rambling so I'll just end by reminding everyone of how another, recent FBI tool that was granted to help fight terrorism has already been perverted according to their own internal investigation to trample on the rights of everyday citizens. The biggest legacy of George Bush will be how he destroyed the perception of what it means to be American.

Nude Thoughts

I was just reading an article about a 18 y/o boy that got a ticket for being on a public street without wearing a shirt. Evidently, there is a 100 year-old law against being in public without a shirt in this Maryland town.

I mention this because it corresponds to a recent string of thoughts that I've had recently. What part of the body is too overtly sexual and should be covered up? Our culture certainly suggests that this includes the butt, pubic area and a women's breasts. But why? What makes a woman's breasts so much different than a man's? Certainly both sexes experience sexual pleasure from them almost identically, so what's the difference? And what about ass? OK, you can argue that it is commonly used in sex acts, but not any more so than one's hands and mouth. Yet we don't typically pop a boner when we see an exposed mouth.

My theory is that body parts deemed to be too sexual for exposure is almost completely determined by culture. That is, breasts only seem too racy because our culture tells us they are and therefore whenever we see them we take special notice that we're seeing something reserved only for intimate, sexual settings. Some parts of the world feel the same way about a thigh or calf or even an ankle as we do about breasts. It is the mere classification of these things as sexual parts that make them so. It seems to me that the only societies that at least treat such things somewhat consistently are those that require women to be completely covered. But even then, what about the men?

The downside of all this is that we begin to see the human form as equally desirable as shameful and inherently sinful. As a child when we happen upon a family member in a semi-nude state, we're already programmed to believe that we've done something very wrong. As we grow this shame becomes internalized into our perceptions of ourselves as well as transferred onto our perceptions of others. Fortunately, many of us learn how to deal with this as we age, but many also do not.

It is too bad that we see something so natural and beautiful as bad. That we've come to prefer the unnatural over the natural and that so many will spend their whole lives hating themselves because of inability to accept their body due to culture-induced, warped view of what the human body should look like.

The Weekend

This weekend we received a last minute invite to go out to a secluded cabin about 2 hours from the city with a group of other nudists. This is kind of the smaller pre-gathering before the normal annual gathering that they have there every year. Of course being still new to nudism, I haven't been before, but have seen some of the pictures. I was excited about going, but in the end the cabin was full due to a communications mix up so we cancelled. We probably could have still gone, but the BF has a severe allergy to sleeping in tents so that was a definite no.

Anyway, we stayed in town and had a relaxing weekend. We saw the movie Wanted with Angelina Jolie, which turned out to be much better than I expected. Although I love watching movies, I am always confounded by how hollywood can spend so much money and yet be so poorly written. The nice thing about Wanted is that it was a dumb movie written very smartly, which is something that I can appreciate.

Saturday night we went to underwear night at the GL, where it was pretty dead, the continued on to the Eagle. I can never figure out how the Eagle gets away with things that you'd never see in any other DC gay bar. I don't go there often, but I'd say that the patio was livelier than usual.

Sunday we were bored and didn't have any plans, so I convinced the BF that we should dust off our bicycles and take a ride. We took Rock Creek Park down to P-Street beach where we watched some tennis then ate a couple of wraps on the grass in a makeshift picnic. Aftwards I hit a few tennis balls then I stopped in the circle for a while before peddling down 17th street on my way home.